I awaken to the winter of my life
The way a child in summer
Awakens to that fading summer.

A pause of regret
Remorse.
A sense of urgency to pack more life more living into the final days.

A child can look at a calendar and count the days until he
She
Must go back to School.

I look into a void when I imagine a calendar of time left in this winter of my life.
I see no date when I may enter those grey then black doors of my final winter,
Like a child,
I feel a sense of urgency to live more
More wisely
To not look back with regret at summer days past
And unlike a child facing the doors of school in autumn,
I hope I can face what come after winter
But before spring
And face that coming grey into darkness with courage
Letting go the regrets
Of summers not lived fully.

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